The Reception

On Arrival | A Seating Plan | Light refreshments | Toasts and Speeches | Toast to the Bride and Bridegroom | Reply to the Bridegroom | Reply to the Toasts of the Bridesmaids | Music for the Reception

Whether the reception is being held at the bride's home or elsewhere, the guests should be welcomed by the bride's parents.

If the reception is being held at home, it is advisable to use a small room in which to receive the guests, and a larger room for serving food.

The guests are received by the mother of the bride, and then by her father. A little farther on they greet the bride­groom's parents, and join the queue leading to the bride and bridegroom, with whom they shake hands, and say a few words of congratulation. They are also introduced to whichever party they have not met. They should not linger talking, or hold up the line of guests behind them waiting to greet the happy pair.

Guests should dispose of their hats and coats before greet­ing the reception party. One room is usually set aside for ladies and another for gentlemen. After divesting them­selves of their hats and coats, the guests should—after offering congratulations to the bridal pair and their host and hostess— inspect the wedding presents. Following this, they chat until the time for luncheon or light refreshments arrives.

At the wedding luncheon it is not customary for the ladies to remove their hats. They should take their gloves off when they sit down, but not before.
The order in which the party go to luncheon is as follows:

First the bride and bridegroom, then the bride's father, leading the bridegroom's mother, followed by the bride­groom's father and the bride's mother, the best man and the chief bridesmaids, and so on.

The bride and bridegroom should sit at the head of the table, the bride on the left side of the bridegroom. On her left sits her father, while her mother sits on the bridegroom's right. The wedding cake is placed in front of the bride. The bridegroom's father sits on the right side of the bride's mother; the bridegroom's mother sits on the left of the bride's father.

LIGHT REFRESHMENTS

At more informal receptions it is the custom to provide light refreshments instead of a sit-down meal. In these circumstances the guests stand about the room chatting while refreshments are handed round.

The custom of giving a large number of toasts has died out, and often only the health of the bride and bridegroom is drunk. Champagne is generally provided for this purpose, though there should also be a supply of non-intoxicant beverages.

TOASTS AND SPEECHES

The first toast at a buffet reception should be given when the wedding meal is about half-way through; at a tea it should be given early on, and at a luncheon, towards the end.

"Health and Happiness to the Bride and Bridegroom" is sometimes proposed by the bride's father, but more often by an old friend of the bride. The speaker will be called upon by the best man who should knock on the table or secure silence in some other way. The bridegroom responds, adding a toast to the bridesmaids. The best man replies for the bridesmaids, and the bridegroom's father has his say. The bride does not generally speak, though she may do so if she wishes.
Speeches should be brief, witty and to the point.

Toast to the Bride and Bridegroom

(Proposedby an Old Friend of the Bride)

I believe that the custom of making speeches at wedding festivities is going out of fashion, but I am sure that there are many present on this happy occasion who will pardon, and perhaps expect a few words from one like myself who has known and held a very high opinion of both Bride and Bridegroom from their childhood. This drinking of healths, with its pretty touch of romance, seems to me specially appropriate in the case of the charming couple to-day.

Let us, therefore, raise our glasses to the Bride and Bridegroom, wishing as we do from our hearts, that health, happiness, and prosperity may attend them through long years of married life, graced by the sunlight of a lasting love. May the affection which animates them to-day burn brighter and more steadfastly as time rolls on, so that all of us who have the privilege of being here to-day may be glad in after-years to remember that we assisted at the opening of a happy story of married life.
I can remember the Bride in her sweet and sunny girlhood, and should like to be allowed to say of her in the words, slightly altered, of Robert Burns:
"I see her in the dewy flowers,
I see her sweet and fair;
I hear her in the tuneful birds,
I hear her charm the air.
There's not a bonny flower that springs
In all the countryside,
There's not a bonny bird that sings
But minds me of the Bride.''

But before I sit down I am tempted to say a few words about the Wedding Ring which has played so important a part in to-day's ceremony:

"And as that ring is rarely found
To flaw or else to sever,
So may their love as endless prove,
And pure as gold for ever.''

Ladies and gentlemen: "The Bride and Bridegroom"

Alternative Toast

Ladies and Gentlemen,

It is my privilege to ask you to honour the toast of the day—the Bride and Bridegroom. If a long acquaintance with the young people who have this morning cast in their lot together can constitute a right to propose their health and prosperity, I certainly have a claim. I have known them pretty well all their young lives, and no one rejoices more truly than I do to see their happiness thus assured. They love each other wisely and well. They have every prospect of true happiness—the love and regard of a very large circle of friends, and a sufficiency of worldly goods. We wish them a long and happy life, with silver and golden wedding-days in store for them, surrounded by those they love. Ladies and gentlemen, I need not insist upon your responding heartily to the toast, since you all feel as I do. May every blessing and happiness attend the Bride and Bridegroom, and long life to them!

Reply by the Bridegroom

The bridegroom's reply is usually brief. He can mention his appreciation of the bride's family, but should not refer to the good qualities of the bride. (His speech, traditionally, must begin with "My wife and I").
Mr. — , and Ladies and Gentlemen:
My wife and I are very happily beginning our wedded life by starting with an agreement—the agreement being our most grateful thanks to you, Mr. — , for the very kind and pleasant manner in which you have proposed our health, and to you all for the hearty manner in which you have responded to the good wishes so eloquently expressed by our friend.
I do not deserve all the good things that have been said of me, but I will try to deserve them, and to be worthy of my wife.

In conclusion, let me again say that I greatly appreciate your kindness, and my wife—you see I am getting used to her new title—wishes me to thank you most heartily for your good wishes. I am sincerely grateful to you all for your kindness in so cheerily drinking our health.

with Toast of the Bridesmaids

Ladies and Gentlemen:
I thank you very sincerely for the heartiness with which the toast of my wife and myself has been proposed and received to-day, and for your generous good wishes for our happiness. I am sure that / shall be happy, and I shall make it my life's highest purpose to make the future for my wife a succession of years of joy and happiness. Please be assured how very deeply and gratefully we thank you. But before I sit down I have the very pleasant duty of proposing to you a toast. There are some ladies here to whom my wife is greatly indebted for the skill with which they helped her to dress this morning. I mean, of course, the Bridesmaids. Quite apart from the very capable manner in which they have discharged their duties, we are all delighted to be honoured with their presence to-day. In my wife's name and my own I thank them for their attention, for the success won by their good taste and their skilful fingers.

Let me specially address the gentlemen present and express my wonder, if with such a wealth of grace and beauty around them they can possibly choose to remain bachelors.

Gentlemen, I am sure you will join me in drinking to the health and "happy-day" prosperity of our charming young friends— the Bridesmaids of to-day and the Brides that should be of a speedy to-morrow.

Reply to the Toast of the Bridesmaids

The best man replies to the toast to the health of the bridesmaids.

Ladies and Gentlemen:
You see before you a man who is both fortunate and unfortunate. Fortunate in being the mouthpiece of so many charming young ladies; unfortunate in being so incapable of giving due expression to their opinions and sentiments.

I am sure they are all delighted to have been of use to-day, only second as ornaments to the Bride herself. I can only guess at their feelings, for I can assure you that I have never occupied so gracious and so important a position as that of a Bridesmaid; but I can imagine that they are glad to see their friend so happily married, and are themselves prepared to follow so good an example when partners turn up after their own hearts. May they all have cause to follow Shakespeare's advice to go down on their knees and thank God, fasting, for a good man's love.

Where the eyes of mankind have been I cannot tell; but I confess it is not saying much for bachelor tastes if they permit my fair friends to be bridesmaids again. For my own part well I won't confess too much. Wait and see!
 
Following the speeches, the best man may read out any telegrams of congratulations that have been received. This tends to become a tedious proceeding at some weddings because many of the senders are unknown to the general company.

After the toasts have been proposed and acknowledged, the bride should go to change for the journey. When she appears in her traveling clothes, the guests should bid her goodbye.

Her parents and the parents of the bridegroom should be the last to take farewell. As the car drives away the guests throw confetti for luck.

If there is dancing at the reception, it is customary for the bride and bridegroom to dance the first dance together, and guests should wait for the bridal couple to begin.

Guests should remain at the wedding reception until the bride and bridegroom have set out for their honeymoon.

MUSIC FOR THE RECEPTION

Gay, popular and perhaps sentimental tunes should be played at the reception. Whether a full orchestra or a humble gramophone is to provide music, the following tunes are appropriate to the occasion:

Chanson Bohemienne                                           Boldi
Liebestraum                                                           Liszt
Merry Widow Waltz                             Johann Strauss
Tales from the Vienna Woods              Johann Strauss
Artist's Life Waltz                                Johann Strauss
Emperor Waltz                                     Johann Strauss

The bride and bridegroom will have their own favourite tunes which they will also include.

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