The Quaker Ceremony

Marriage conducted according to the usage of the Society of Friends were accorded legal validity in 1661 and the usage has been confirmed by subsequent legislation. Limited at first to those in membership, an Act of i860 permitted an extension to those who, though not in membership, were in agreement with the Quaker testimony as to the nature and character of marriage.

At the public Meeting for Worship appointed specially for the purpose, the couple stand, take one another by the hand, and declare as follows, one after the other, the man saying:

“Friends, I take this my Friend CD., to be my wife, promising, through Divine assistance, to be unto her a loving and faithful husband, until it shall please the Lord by death to separate us.''

The bride then makes a similar declaration:

“Friends, I take my Friend A.B., to be my husband, promising, through Divine assistance, to be unto him a loving and faithful wife, until it shall please the Lord by death to separate us.''

The Declaration may be prefaced by: "In the presence of the Lord" or "In the fear of the Lord and in the presence of this Assembly."

If they prefer, the bride and bridegroom may declare as follows, the bridegroom saying:

"Friends, I take this my Friend CD. to be my wife, promising, through Divine assistance, and so long as we both on earth shall live, to be unto her a loving and faithful husband.''

And the bride:

“Friends, I take this my Friend A.B. to be my husband, pro­mising, through Divine assistance, and so long as we both on earth shall live, to be unto him a loving and faithful wife.''
During the Meeting, a marriage certificate, prepared beforehand and stating that certain obligations have been fulfilled and the necessary declarations made, is signed by them. The bride signs with her maiden name, or if a widow, with her widow name.

After being signed by at least two of those present, as witnesses, the marriage certificate is read audibly by some suitable person. After the conclusion of the Meeting the certificate may be signed by others present at the marriage.

On the conclusion of the Meeting, the marriage is registered by the Registering Officer in his duplicate-register books. Every such entry must be signed by the bride and bridegroom and two witnesses, and by the Registering Officer.

The Registering Officer of the Monthly Meeting of which the woman is a member, or of the area in which she lives if not a member, gives the parties all necessary assistance and advice regarding procedure.

At least six weeks before the date of the marriage, one party should apply to the Registering Officer of the Liberating Monthly Meeting for a copy of Marriage Form A. This should be returned completed and signed by both parties.

Form A consists of several forms for use by the parties and officers of the Society, issued for convenience under one cover.

The forms concerning the parties consist of: (i) A joint declaration of intention of marriage with an intimation of the place and time at which it is desired that the marriage may be solemnized. (Form Ai).

(2) An application by either of the parties who is not in membership, for permission to marry according to the usages of the Society (Form A2 (i) for the men and Form A3 (i) for the woman); each supported by the written recommendation of two adult members of the Society.

If either or both parties are not in membership, the Regis­tering Officer of the Liberating Monthly Meeting on receipt of Form A, and if both parties are resident in the area of his Monthly Meeting, and he assents to the application, issues a certificate of permission (Form B).

On receipt of Form Ai, the Registering Officer gives public notice of the intended marriage at the close of the First-day Morning Meeting of which the parties are members or which they usually attend, or within the limits of which they reside.
If the Registering Officer receives any notice of objection, which must be in writing, he must immediately inform the parties.

After the expiration of seven days from the date of the public notice, the Registering Officer fills up and signs Form A4, certifying that he had received no notice of objection, or that he has received notice of objection.

Meetings for Worship for the solemnization of marriage are appointed by the Monthly Meeting within the limits of which they are to be held.

The Meeting making the appointment must arrange for the attendance of a sufficient number of suitable Friends at such Meetings, in order that they may be rightly held in accordance with Quaker custom.

Public notice of every Meeting appointed for the solemni­zation of marriage must be given at die place at which it is to be held at the close of the usual Meeting for Worship last held there before the day of solemnization.
The Registering Officer of the Liberating Monthly Meeting produces all the relevant documents, including Form A (complete), and the requisite certificate(s) or certificate and License of the Superintendent Registrar, to the Clerk and to an Overseer of the Liberating Monthly Meeting.

If the Clerk and Overseer are satisfied that the forms have been completed correctly, they sign Form A8 liberating the parties to solemnize their intended marriage.

The parties being liberated for their intended marriage, the Registering Officer of the Liberating Monthly Meeting sends to the Registering Officer of the Monthly Meeting within the limits of which the marriage is to be solemnized, Form A complete; also the certificate, certificates or license of the Superintendent Registrar. The ceremony then takes place on the appointed day, as described previously.

The Quaker ceremony appeals to many non-members of the Society of Friends, because of its beauty and simplicity.

The information given in this chapter has been obtained from the Marriage Regulations of the Society of Friends. Full particulars are given in Chapter XIII, Church Govern­ment, Christian Discipline, Part III.

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